Grow Some Labia!
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(Audio) How To Screw Up Your Kids For Life At Christmas
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(Audio) How To Screw Up Your Kids For Life At Christmas

If Jesus or Santa are too lenient, you can still punish the year’s sins with stupid costumes and big-ass letters

If you went to Sunday school or something you had to be part of the Pageant, I don’t know why, maybe to impress upon our young impressionable minds a lesson of the similar trials and tribulations Christian kids have been forced to endure through the centuries before we became holy crusaders, sadistic inquisitors and imperialist oppressors. You were doomed to this fate because parents love any opportunity to watch their hapless, helpless offspring dress up in silly pseudo-adult costumes and look ridiculous the way our parents were forced to do when they were kids. Probably in damp, chilly catacombs.

Christmas can be hell!

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