He was good at playing women, but he offers further lessons on red flag recognition, as well as a *helpful* lesson for single men who don't want to be.
First of all, I love the term “pudenda chasing.” Kudos.
As for the appeal of these Lotharios, they blow hot and cold, leaving their partners breathless for more. And this can only work once “intimacy” has been established. Too bad the women he conned couldn’t see the difference between real and faked intimacy. Many people can’t, including men who are conned by women. Like you point out, it all comes down to impatience. We want a partner “right now”- that’s why we go on addictive dating apps. We no longer get to know people slowly under normal social conditions. But we also get access to all kinds of people we would otherwise never meet. Aye, there’s the rub: more risk. We have to be careful with people we don’t know and who don’t know anyone we know. They could be rapists, scammers, two-timers, or catfishers. Two people I know got caught up in those kind of traps, one of them a man. And I once fell hard for a guy who was dating at least two other women without telling me (I was too naive to ask). The feelings people develop in these situations are real- they’re just based on fantasy.
This guy had a good run of it. But it doesn’t seem to have made him happy. I guess we all need to go to relationship school.
First of all, I love the term “pudenda chasing.” Kudos.
As for the appeal of these Lotharios, they blow hot and cold, leaving their partners breathless for more. And this can only work once “intimacy” has been established. Too bad the women he conned couldn’t see the difference between real and faked intimacy. Many people can’t, including men who are conned by women. Like you point out, it all comes down to impatience. We want a partner “right now”- that’s why we go on addictive dating apps. We no longer get to know people slowly under normal social conditions. But we also get access to all kinds of people we would otherwise never meet. Aye, there’s the rub: more risk. We have to be careful with people we don’t know and who don’t know anyone we know. They could be rapists, scammers, two-timers, or catfishers. Two people I know got caught up in those kind of traps, one of them a man. And I once fell hard for a guy who was dating at least two other women without telling me (I was too naive to ask). The feelings people develop in these situations are real- they’re just based on fantasy.
This guy had a good run of it. But it doesn’t seem to have made him happy. I guess we all need to go to relationship school.