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From Ritual to Romance's avatar

You continue to amaze me with your “Let ‘‘em have it” attitude. Nobody can escape your censure unless they adhere to genuine humanist and common sense values. You might look extreme to some, but one day, if we all wake up to something resembling reality, we will be considering ideas like yours. Then the true discussion can begin.

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Julia's avatar

I stumbled upon your blog from Freddie deBoer's subscriber writing post. I know this is probably a waste of time but I wish you would be a little more open minded about trans people. For most of us it's really very simple: we want to be addressed and treated as the gender we identify with, the same as cis people are most of the time addressed and treated as the gender they identify with. We pursue medical treatment in order to shape our bodies into a form we like better and live more happy lives. In doing so, the only people we might hurt are ourselves. We might hurt close friends and family who may have expected we live as our assigned gender for the rest of our lives, but just as you wouldn't force a loved one to pursue a career or remain in a relationship they were unhappy with and made them depressed, you wouldn't force a loved one to live as a gender they are unhappy with. And in the vast majority of the time, that works. Yes, there *are* people who regret transitioning. But they are a very small minority and it should be noted that some fraction of people detransition because of transphobia: because they feel ostracized or marginalized or fetishized and to them it's worth it to suffer gender dysphoria than to feel as if you are constantly under attack. Personally, I am much much happier since transitioning. I feel like I am able to have real emotions, to have real friendships, real relationships, and I feel so much more confident. I used to have pretty bad social anxiety (and worse things) but that almost completely disappeared after transitioning. So I'm just asking to have a little empathy: we're just people trying to feel better in our own bodies and in the world, trying our best.

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