Conservative Humor: It's Getting F'n Funny & It's Pwning Da Woke!

It's no longer an oxymoron. Conservative humor speaks truth to 'woke' power, which is what those humophobic bitches fear (and need) the most!

CC BY-NC-ND 2.0 image by Dathan’s Pattishall on Flickr

Just imagine if the opening ceremony for the 2024 Paris Summer Olympics had featured a blackface ensemble re-enacting a slave auction or suggesting Native Americans had it coming.

Paris would have been in flames.

Radical Wokery, like radical Islam, has no sense of humor, and it’s not afraid to set fire to that which it doesn’t like.

Not that the ‘Last Supper’ re-enactment was either funny or appropriate. The Olympics are meant to bring the world together, not tear it apart further with ugly identity politics.

Maybe for the 2026 Winter Olympics they can let the Proud Boys re-enact the January 6th attack in drag or the 1968 Chicago riots at the Democratic National Convention, re-imagined with the NRA there to greet the hippies.

You gotta wonder what brainiacs on the committee authorized the opening ceremony global debacle. “Hey, mes amis, you know what we should do? Re-enact Leonardo Da Vinci’s The Last Supper with a bunch of drag queens, but we’ll pagan it up enough that we can pretend it was a re-enactment of a Dionysian orgy.”

Except that Barbara Butch, the plus-sized lesbian in the center of the tableau (she’s a real lesbian, not a late-middle-aged sissy porn-inspired autogynephile), admitted on Instagram it was inspired by Da V, as did a statement from Paris 2024.

It was an unforgivable exercise in bad taste and poor judgement, and gee, it didn’t exactly improve the image of drag queens, a formerly fairly obscure peninsula of entertainment most people had zero awareness of until it was dragged out of gay clubs by heterosexual woody wankers on TikTok.

Great humor speaks truth to power

What will defeat wokeness faster than putting to pasture hoary old Democratic politicians like anti-Semites Cori Bush and Jamaal Bowman who are so 2023, will be holding it up for ridicule. There’s nothing the powerful fear more than finding themselves in the gun sights of comedians and critics locked and loaded for calling out social just-us hypocrisies, their pretensions and especially their arrogant but bogus claims of high-minded morality.

Left-wing bigotry no longer looks much different from the right-wing brand, just essential disagreement over who to hate. Whether it’s fear and loathing of the so-called ‘oppressor’ groups or xenophobic forgetfulness that everyone’s ancestors came from somewhere else, and didn’t look a thing like the natives, it’s bigotry whichever way they skew.

It doesn’t appear conditions for diminishing American freedoms are set to change in January as we will either preserve the wokeocracy tyranny currently in place, or exchange it for a return to Republican MAGA tyranny.

Making fun of the powerful will still be difficult, regardless of our new overlords, because the right has begun to embrace ‘cancel culture’ more openly.

Publicly stating that one wishes Thomas Crooks had killed Donald Trump can get you as fired as calling a transwoman a man. ‘Cancel culture’ has always existed on both sides since loooooong before the term was invented, but with right-wing populism on the rise around the world, including the United States, the Radical Right has nicked the ‘progressive’ playbook on how to destroy anyone who disagrees with them or ‘offends’ their own pearls-clutchers. The right-wing Libs of TikTok have activated to deplatform and fire those who state or make jokes about Trump’s near-brush with death.

Cracking a joke won’t be any less dangerous under Trump Part Deux. Welcome to the world thou hast wrought, Wokies!

But the good news is it’ll be less dangerous to poke the woke social just-us set. The tables are turning.

Dave Chappelle, your country needs you!

I’m a little reticent to call on Chappelle to be our New Savior for taking the piss out of the supercilious insufferables, not because of the kerfuffle over his alleged ‘anti-trans’ remarks a few years ago, but because he’s re-embraced ‘punching down’ by taking on the disabled. I’m not sure what to make of that yet; some of his material is funny, frankly, and he does joke that he’s taking them on because he loves ‘punching down’ (←making fun of his critics) and the disabled are less-organized than the trans set(←making fun of trans power).

I’m not sure all disabled folks will hate him, either. Like everyone, some have a sense of humor about themselves and know that exclusion from joshing humor can be as hurtful as a building with no front door ramp.

Others won’t like it. That’s the nature of humor. Someone, somewhere, or something is the joke. Don’t watch, listen to, or read it if you don’t like it, but don’t pretend you’re under violent attack because someone pointed out your ideological slip is showing.

Chappelle is a damned funny guy, and his trans jokes in The Closer were spot-on, while liberals like Jon Stewart and others struggle to be funny in a tight-assed world where their every joke can be their last. Dave Chappelle is the man who can help us dissect woke values, beliefs and practices ripe for ripping. Stewart has become a hapless wokeweenie.

Chappelle might be ready for it. He’s got fuck-you money, just like J.K. Rowling, whom the transactivist community created.

Jerry Seinfeld is interviewed by The Free Press’s Bari Weiss on the humorlessness of the woke left

Conservative comedy and critique is on the rise and—it’s getting really f’n funny. And on the nose.

You don’t have to be conservative to see the humor and desperate need for piss-stealing from the illiberal woke left. Conservative humor is still struggling but it’s beginning to understand that for political humor to truly work, you have to understand the hypocrisy on your own side first.

Where can humorists and comedians confront the less-marginalized-than-advertised and take back all our power from our wannabe cultural dick-tators on the far left?

Let’s see, there’s Black Lives Matter, which purports to be ‘antiracist’ while lobbing ‘genocide’ accusations at Israel and supporting Hamas, an explicitly genocidal terrorist group. If BLM was any more racist they’d Jawohl.

There’s the related resounding ignorance of All Things Middle Eastern among the campus protester set. Call me a cranky old grandma from the post-Sixties if you like, but at least the hippie protesters could mostly locate Vietnam on a map.

How about taking on ‘feminists’ celebrating women’s accomplishments almost entirely with men in drag?

How about a forthcoming American election fronted almost entirely by DEI picks - like one chosen because she’s female and, bonus, several different race thingies? And she picked a white man for her running mate, to assure the racists on both sides that she’ll have something to temper all that Black Lives Matter Radical Violent Energy white people often imagine is simmering just beneath the surface with black Americans? Not to mention Republican DEI fave J.D. Vance, because who else would Donald Trump pick except a white man?

His little toadstool would fall off if he chose a woman. Or even a black guy. Not that there are many to choose from in the Republican party, or who would be willing to put up with him as their boss for four years. (To be fair, most white people don’t want to work for him either. He went through most of us trying to assemble a Cabinet after his first election win.)

‘Colonization’? Let’s talk about non-white colonization, and the black African love affair with slavery still going on! Slavery! Yeah, let’s speculate on how many woke ‘antiracist’ black people love porn and prostitutes, much of it supplied by human trafficking!

‘Colonization’ of Israel: How come campus protesters never talk about the Arab invasion of the land 1,300 years ago? And speaking of ‘decolonizing’, if that means pushing the traditional oppressors out of places they don’t belong, why can’t we ‘decolonize’ males—the Original ‘Oppressors’—out of women’s bathrooms, locker rooms, sports teams and prisons?

And as for ‘privilege’, it’s time to highlight and rub in the wokies’ insipid faces that class is the ultimate privilege: It trumps race, sex, culture, religion, sexual preference, and all other so-called ‘marginalization’ pretensions. S/he who has the gold makes the rules.

And let’s not forget the most ridiculous woke social just-us community of them all: The hate-all-TERFs trans community. ‘Nuff said.

Conservative humor: It’s getting better

‘Offense’ complaints often really mean, “Someone just shish-kabob’ed my hypocrisy.” Was it really ‘punching down’ when Dave Chappelle skewered trans-identified men’s hyper-masculinity when he joked about a transwoman ‘slamming her dick on the table,’ at a board meeting? Is there any doubt this group is one of the most aggressively male—and violent—movements ever? How often do transactivists physically assault feminist protesters? Who has the real power when the transactivists - invariably male - invariably get away with it?

Some formerly untouchable humor has already been touched.

The comedy duo Key and Peele have made fun of—a slave auction.

The Libs of TikTok does a great job of highlighting woke stupidity, although if Trump and his DEI pick get elected, we’re going to need a MAGAs of TikTok.

Conservatives are getting better at humor, or maybe it’s just level-headed liberals who can see their side’s hypocrisies, but I suspect far-left extremism has helped conservatives finally see the light of what humor’s main function is: To take the piss out of the powerful, the high, the mighty, and the insufferably ill-humored.

Kinda harder to see when historically your lot has been so high on the power apex that you thought the poor were ants. But now, the folks bleating the loudest about powerlessness are clearly the most powerful; their plaintive wails sounding remarkably like conservatives during the Reagan and First Bush Reigns of Error.

Conservative ‘humor’ has suffered a well-deserved drubbing over the years for coming across as mean-spirited and ‘punching down’. One early attempt, the conservative comic strip Mallard Fillmore, about a duck who worked as a conservative political reporter, attempted to poke fun at liberals and came across badly because the left hadn’t yet gone completely off the deep end back then, and because so many conservative values themselves were genuinely mean-spirited. It’s hard to find the humor in their dislike of birth control education for children when their idea of birth control was ‘close your legs’ (but only for girls), not to mention their ongoing love affair with enforced childbirth.

There certainly was hypocrisy on the left back then, but the right fished around and came up with little better than bait.

As lefty comedy gets unfunnier and more boring for fear of being cancelled, right-wing comedy is finding its groove and is getting, well, sorry to break it to you, funnier!

As Martha Stewart would say, it’s a good thing.

We should welcome the larfs no matter who they come from—as long as they’re genuinely funny and make a real point.

You may not agree with it, but if a joke really pisses you off—you probably deserved it. You’re the one they’re making fun of. For good reason.

Time to time-out and spend some quality time on ‘self-reflection’.

The reason there are so many ‘politically homeless’ voters who comprise the real wild cards for both parties in the forthcoming U.S. election is because we see the hypocrisy and bankrupt morality on both sides. We don’t know who to vote for because neither party convinces us they can do a better job than the other guys.

They’re both proven hot messes: We’ve seen a working (ha!) Trump administration and now, with Joe Biden retired, younger, more intentional wokeocrats.

But one thing’s clear: The way to take down the powerful far left is, having infected and infested the media, academia, political power, entertainment, sports, and many other arenas and institutions, is to make fun of it. Take the piss out of it. Anonymously, if necessary, and it will be (including protected free speech the Trumpies will surely go after since they don’t value First Amendment rights any more than the wokies).

While liberals stress out over the far-right manifesto Project 2025, we all need to ask ourselves whether there’s an opposite version somewhere on the Internet we never found, but which has successfully made itself the new-ish law of the land.

Something to think about.

And another battle to fight, too.

When I’m not fondly remembering an ancient era in America with a Fairness Doctrine, equal-time broadcast laws, and a Washington D.C. where Republicans and Democratic politicians put their differences aside at night to share a brewski or two side by side at their favorite watering hole, I help women and others reclaim their power at Grow Some Labia.